Nipplestaches and Pony Trees

Note: This three-way conversation was spawned by a mass email containing the following two pictures:

 

me: i'm sorry you don't have enough body hair to grow a face/neck/chest/nipplestache

tony: it's probably for the best, because there is part of me that wants to do it

jody: there's part of me that wants that too. that's why i sent you the pic. lol!

me: we would all love to see that

tony: i know
tony: you'll have to settle for me hiding horses in the backyard

me: in a hole? wtf!

tony: plant a horse, grow a horsetree, harvest ponies

me: lol! i love you, tony

tony: you just want one of the ponies from my orchard.

me: well...can i have one?

tony: it's gonna be a bumper crop, so yeah, i suppose

me: you're ridiculous

jody: lol i would like a bushel of ponies please!

me: what would you do with a bushel of ponies?

jody: put them in water until they root and then plant my own horses so i can have my own pony trees
jody: i would give you a lovely bouquet of ponies too

tony: i barrel them. easier to stack.

jody: no i need more effort. i want a beautiful bouquet of ponies
jody: if you pick them at just the right time they are small enough for a bouquet
jody: you can't wait until they're so big you have to barrel them.

tony: you haven't lived until you crack into a barrel of lightly aged pony with just the right amount of oaky aroma.

jody: and then what, pour a sample tasting into your pony snifter?

me: wow. just wow.

tony: you don't age your pony?

me: this conversation has gotten out of hand